I think I’m Bacon-ed Out.

Vegan, Vegetarian… I have been all of them.
I was raised macrobiotic starting at birth, which switched to vegan, then vegetarian, and the sudden occurance of a soy allergy in my mom drove our family to pescatarianism. By 7th grade my family was eating red meat on a weekly/monthly basis after a doctor informed my mom it would be healthier for my celiac, graves dieseased suffering sister. It worked. She ate steak and eggs for breakfast for years.

While I tend to not eat chicken unless it’s perfectly cooked and don’t usually go for beef (No steak and eggs for me!) I eventually chose to continue eating meat.

I consider myself an omnivore. Human beings have teeth made both for meat and plants. Who am I to argue with that?
I have thought about becoming a pescatarian again, but not vegetarian, I could never give up sushi. There is one particular food that keeps me from being a pescatarian.
Bacon.

It is so delicious, and so versatile! Need a quick protein to go with a pasta? Bacon, carmelized onions, some herbs and spices with a olive oil… mm, perfect.

You can put it in candy, cupcakes, cookies, salads, dips, sandwiches, everything is better with bacon. Except drinks. Can’t make a good drink with bacon, sorry, eww. And milkshakes count as dessert, not drinks.

While I do enjoy and love really good bacon, I don’t a prove of the over use of bacon that our society is so found of.
The following are real items where bacon is being abused.

Bacon Lubricant & Massage Oil – I don’t care how much someone loves bacon, I am not licking bacon flavoring off of some guys lollipop. It’s not appealing. Hell, I am addicted to sushi and smoked salmon bagels, but those would be crappy libricant flavors too!

Bacon Soda– I have said it once, I will say it again, bacon and drinks don’t mix. Also, the idea of meat soda makes my stomach churn just as much as bacon mayonaise…. yuck.

Squeez Bacon– For those days you want bacon but not the hassel of cooking, just like squeeze cheeze, we now have Squeez Bacon. Disgusting! How much real bacon could possibly be in here? From how many different pigs? Just pop a few slices in the oven on 400° on a cookie sheet, it cooks as the oven heats up. Easy, and no need for a tube!

Bacon Soap– There’s nothing really wrong with this. Hell, it’s your body, you can smell like bacon as much as you like. The website warns that it will make you irresistable to dogs, which isn’t terrible unless you’re walking through a dog kennel or shelter. It just reminded me of this: Why Was There Bacon In The Soap!?!?

The food world always seems to move in trends. One day it’s all about cupcakes, the next cronuts. Soon we will move on to a new hit food item and there will be clothes, lipbalms, candles, and toothpastes made out of it. I just hope it’s sushi!

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